I had the opportunity recently to see an old friend and share a nice, Turkish lunch. As we became comfortable and relaxed, we connected with each other, and started sharing our past, including a few not so pleasant life experiences . . . things that were disappointing, hurtful, painful, scary and some you might even call devastating.
As our stories were embraced with undivided attention, empathy, non-judgmental openness, curiosity and care - there was a sense of flow and easiness. As a result, I personally felt lighter in my heart, and in my being, as I realized that I gave my story room to breathe, to be, to flow, I did not hide it inside of my being. I felt SEEN and HEARD. It is a beautiful feeling. I realized that we all have those hard and painful stories and sharing them makes our human experience easier and lighter as we realize that we are not the only ones that have gone through challenging times.
We all want to live happy and healthy lives. Many times, in pursuing that, there can be a tendency to attach to and focus on only the positive aspects of life, and to want more pleasant experiences. Yet, it is healthier not to completely ignore your negative feelings and simply give them air to breathe and release.
Life is like a rainbow, it has many colors. The year has 4 seasons, not only summer. There is day and night, light and darkness.
Embracing and expressing all our experiences, feelings and emotions is vital to live a life that is whole, real and authentic. It brings lightness to our soul and relaxation to our bodies.
As humans we feel a tapestry of emotions as the result of situations that we are in.
Being true and authentic to yourself and your feelings is the highest form of self- care. It takes courage to speak your own truth:
The act of self-care may be to have that difficult conversation with your spouse about the big, pink elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about for decades.
We all want to be seen, heard, validated, and understood. So, let's have courage to open part of our hearts to one another, to share our story, to uncover the corner of our soul.
Is it scary?
You bet it is. It takes us out of our comfort zone. There is fear.
Fear to open-up.
Fear to ask for what we need or want from others.
Fear of rejection.
Fear of being ridiculed.
Fear of judgment.
Being authentic and real may feel quite difficult and not pleasant, and like the least thing you want to do or face. Being authentic is to love oneself unconditionally with all the good, bad and ugly.
But when we do it, we don't need to escape. We don't have to medicate or over-drink or over-eat.
Being authentic is like being your own hero in your life versus being a victim.
It is being at real peace with yourself every day, so you are enough to yourself.
It is so worth it. You are totally WORTHY of being your own hero!
That creates a sense of wholeness within your own being, your own heart.
That is the only real place from which you can give and offer love to another.
Otherwise, we risk operating from a place of emptiness, lack or need.
As a physical and myofascial release therapist, I try to lead by example and relate to my clients as the authentic me. Since healing begins with an honest relationship and understanding of yourself, both physically and mentally, I also teach how to help my clients relate better to their bodies and help themselves. In our hands-on sessions, we may discover places in your body where you are holding yourself back, release tight muscles and fascia related to pain, and suggest ways to manage the return to an authentic state of well-being!
The mind and body cannot be separated.
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