Since 1991, the Heart-Math Institute has researched heart-brain communication and its relationship to managing stress, increasing internal body harmony and deepening our connection with others and ourselves. Based on their studies, it is safe to say that our heart radiates a much greater electromagnetic field around us versus our brain.
It is there that I recently attended a seminar with a friend of mine that was about self-love and connection to our own heart. Since I practiced that skill for many years now, it was easy for me, but my friend asked very legitimate questions after the class was done; What does it mean to connect to the heart? How do you do that?
So, for the beginners, just sit or lie comfortably, relax your body by breathing gently, allow your mind to be quiet from all the chatter, place your hand or hands on the area of your chest and breathe into your chest, keeping your attention on that area. Give yourself about 5 minutes a day to do just that. In that simple way, you will start connecting with your own heart space. As you do that, allow the sensations, feelings, and emotions to surface naturally. This is the easiest and most gentle way for you to be in touch with your own feelings.
Some of you may know that I lost someone very close and special to me 6 months ago due to sudden death following extended physical illness. Going though the process of grieving and allowing myself to feel all the emotions associated with such a loss is not easy.
There have been days that feeling that pain, loss, grief, and anguish felt like an unbearable ordeal to go through. When it happened, I allowed myself to feel it fully down to the bones. When I felt like I could not take it anymore, I asked Spirit/ God to help me. Peace and deeper serenity came after I allowed all of my pain to simply go through my heart. It is a process, and at some point, it gets easier and easier. You don't want to bottle it all up in your body.
We have such a strong emphasis in our culture that we are supposed to only have good times. It is normal and natural to gravitate towards pleasant experiences, but human life encompasses the wholeness of feelings. No matter if we go through pleasant or painful parts of our lives, feeling it fully and letting it go through our hearts is the healthiest way of living. The bottom line is to fully feel it and let it pass, without clinging to the pleasant times and repressing or resisting the unpleasant times, all without judgment. This is the very best definition of acceptance.
We can't have a rainbow without the rain and the storm. When it comes to our emotions, pain and unpleasant feelings are as part of the wholeness of our human heart as are joy, laughter and fun. Allow yourself to fully feel it without running away from those feelings. Oftentimes in our culture we are trained to mask the pain with drugs, alcohol, and different distractions. I believe that feeling our own hearts is both scary and brave at the same time.
It does take courage to live from the heart space, and to fully love yourself and others. It is OK to be fully you. If you grieve, love the one who grieves. If you are upset, love the one who is upset, YOU. If you are angry, that is OK, love the one who is angry. Just love and accept your own emotions without blaming anyone for causing them.
Own them. Oftentimes we put such a pressure on ourselves, looking back with regret on how we acted or what we felt. Our goal is to always get into a higher level of harmony and balance within ourselves, and, in the process of doing that, rebuild our heart space to again radiate joy and love to others.
Open your heart to yourself and others. Be vulnerable. Feel life. The best way to keep your heart open and enjoy the ecstasy of life is to never close your heart, no matter what life brings you. Bask in the sunshine of unconditional happiness.
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